Poems and prose about mortality, fragility, cancer, humanity, love & life. It’s not escapism but reality or the reality of a moment
People think they see me
But they don’t see anything that’s there
They miss my heart, my kindness
My soul as it lays bare
Physical form, it blinds some
It keeps away our true light
Distracts us from our purpose
Chasing fantasies into the night
It’s ok to have a freckle on your face
As long as it’s in the perfect place
It’s ok to have curls
All wild and long
Streaming down, but never coming undone
It‘s ok to have some extra fat
As long as it’s placed where you guys want it at
It’s ok to work a medial job
As long as you don’t mind being called a bogan slob
It’s ok to be short
As long as you wish to not date
It’s ok to have small breasts
As long as you understand your unsexy fate
It’s ok to be very old
As long as you wish to be alone
It’s ok to be a poor man
As long as you wish to never own your home
It’s ok to be ill
It’s ok to be sick in the head
As long as you afford the drugs
But don’t expect sympathy lying in your bed
It’s ok to be many things
But mostly it’s just not
It’s always easier for the other
But if it’s you, it’s not
Try and think outside your space
Just consider another’s shoes
Would you really walk much further
Could you really choose?
Sometimes things are out of reach
No matter what we do
So be a little kinder dear
You’ve got nothing else to prove
What I really wanted was for you to bare your soul.
To show me all the little pieces where no one else could go.
I searched for you in every face, in every passer by.
But as the days progressed I could see it was all a waste of time
What I really wanted was for you to crave my soul.
To pick up all those pieces that you spread. Put me back, make me whole.
You never even turned your head to see if I’m still there. As I lay there bleeding from the heartache as you left.
What I really wanted was for you to never leave. To hold me in your arms. Hold me close, just squeeze.
You’ll never understand the love I had that was true. Insecurity ate it up spat it out, you never knew.
I just wanted you to see every good thought and good deed. But everything you twisted into some kind of negativity make believe.
But I meant every word and I meant so much more. Just wanted you to feel I always held open that door.
There was no other man. No other prize. I just wanted you for you. You were perfect in my eyes.
What I really wanted was for you to treat me kind. Not to push me to till I break. Test my waters till I cried.
I wanted nothing more than for you to have your success. Just to see you happy to have nothing but the best.
Instead you moved on. Like I never meant a thing. I guess you’ll never understand just exactly what I was offering.
What I really wanted and all I’ll ever need, it was you all along. No one else could ever supersede.
We don’t know where we’re going, just like stardust we’re still floating in the air.
But my heart it’s still beating has the resin on my heart strings from you there. It’s so unfair.
Was only such a short time, full of ups and downs like waves across the sea, but boy weren’t the highs higher than any mountain I’ve ever seen.
I hope some day we look back on our times & laugh at just how silly that we were. To almost put this spark out, with our head strong ways and darling if you please…
Can i introduce myself now to the man that I was too scared to really see.
JaxTrax 